Many of us live a fast paced, overburdened, and demanding life. Because we have made certain life choices, we may find ourselves a bit harried and overwhelmed.

When we experience these feelings, we may find ways of taking shortcuts, even in our communication patterns with each other.

What are the first words that we throw away or don't use when we are rushing through our activities, running late for an appointment, or when we feel pressured at home or work to get things done?

The words that often go missing are the simple but most valued ones such as, "please, thank you, I appreciate it, may I, would you please, may I help."

When those words are dropped from our vocabulary, we are left with phrases that can sound bossy, demanding, or even rude. The bridges of goodwill between co-workers may be burned when we fail to use words of civility with them.

Why can the absence of "please" and "thank you" in our conversations with others have such a chilling effect?

Why does it irritate us so much when we allow someone in traffic to go ahead of us and they do not grace us with a simple hand wave, acknowledging our kindness? Because we may feel as though we are not being appreciated and respected.

We want to know that we are important to others, that we matter and that we are validated. When someone takes the time to express their thanks, appreciation, or otherwise show respect for your feelings by using those simple words mentioned above, we might find our relationships with them strengthened. We may also find that when we show the same courtesy towards them their feelings for us are more positive.

What if we made a pact with members of our families and our co-workers to speak only in civil tones to each other for one week?

During that week use the magic words "please, thank you, I appreciate you, I appreciate what you did" and other such empowering words. Would we find improved relations, better communication, and a healthier connection with these important people? Would it be worthwhile to continue this practice and make it a habit?

Whenever an opportunity presents itself to show kindness and civility to others, take that opportunity without demanding anything in return.

Let the mere act itself be the reward that you get for your graciousness. And yes, that includes not responding in anger when the person who cut in front you in traffic fails to acknowledge your act of kindness.